How to Make Networking Conversations That Work
You don't need more coffee chats. You need better ones.
I recently spoke with a leader who had 12 "networking conversations" in two months. Few meaningful connections. Few leads. Few follow-ups from the other person.
Here's what most people miss: People want to help you, but you're making it hard for them to do it.
The problem isn't that people don't care. The problem is you're asking them to analyze trends, generate insights, and do work for you.
When you ask "What's happening in your industry?" you're asking them to become a consultant. When you ask "Who should I be talking to?" you're asking them to do recruiting work.
Your networking often fails because you're giving them homework.
Try This Approach
Effective networking conversations don't extract value—they exchange it. They're built on curiosity about the person, not what they can give you.
Instead of asking them to analyze trends for you, ask questions they can answer easily:
"What's energizing you about your work right now?"
"How did you know your current role was the right fit?"
"What drew you to this organization?"
These questions let them share what they know and think about, rather than asking them to generate new insights for you.
After the conversation: Send a real follow-up. One line is enough. "That part about X stuck with me—thank you." Then stay visible. Comment on their posts. Share their wins.
Strong networking conversations don't chase opportunity. They build credibility over time. When the right moment comes, you're not a stranger asking for help—you're someone they know and think well of.
This post is part of our member content for leaders navigating career decisions. Because relationships usually matter more than transactions.